ellieet: (John smiling)
[personal profile] ellieet
I am fuming.

There's a lot in that episode I screamed at. Toby; Sherlock with the baby; Sherrinford.

There is also a lot that pissed me off.

When I came out of the Odeon a year ago after watching The Abominable Bride, I felt something I hadn't felt for four years; hope in the series. I had become more and more frustrated with John in Series 3, his casual unkindnesses, his sheer obliviousness to everything Sherlock is trying to do for him to keep him safe and happy, how fine he seemed with it when Mary shot Sherlock. After TAB, I was elated; I thought we had that John Watson back; steadfast and loyal and on the ball, there for Sherlock.

Mary has redeemed herself. John has not.

Now, I get it. A lot happened in this episode; a lot of things occurred, a lot of drama and twists and turns. And mainly, a lot of Sherlock trying to keep Mary safe.

And all the while - and I realise I mustn't jump to conclusions here because this is Sherlock and there may be a dramatic reveal somewhere down the line that tells us that not all is as it seems - John is apparently having an affair. Or contemplating one.

I know; this theory is not 100% set in stone. I know; John is only human and people cheat. I know, we don't know how far it went; who that woman on the bus is, what the flower means.

But what I do know is that I am severely disappointed that the writers took this direction with him, if it does turn out to have been an affair. And no, it's not because it's some random woman and not Sherlock. The truth is and I'm getting on my high horse here, I'm sorry - I do not like the idea of John Watson committing adultery. Yes, I know, this is a man who has killed people and done other things as well. He was a soldier; he's fought beside Sherlock.

I never thought, though, he would be the kind of man to betray his family. I always saw John as being there when you need him most; as steadfast and faithful, as fundamentally kind even if he doesn't always act like it, as a good man. Despite the shakiness of him in Series 3, he has always been considered - and portrayed thus in fandom - as good.

And if he's done what we've been lead to believe that he's done - then I can't find any love for him right now.

If he did cheat on Mary, then I'm sorry. But I cannot forgive that in a hurry. I know; I mustn't jump to conclusions - it might be something else and I'm actually hoping it might be. That the John Watson we have followed, known and loved for the past six-and-a-half years would not do something like that - that he would not sabotage his family life that he fought so hard for. I do wonder if Mary genuinely knew and if they were about to have that conversation when Sherlock texted them.

In any case, my worst fears at the end of the episode were realised: John turning his back on Sherlock after losing Mary, magically deciding it was all his fault. I read a fanfiction of that scenario once and it made me cry and haunted me for a very long time. Now, plausibly speaking it won't be forever but this has just angered me further. John knows Mary. He knows how stubborn, independent, brave and fierce she is. She is exactly the kind of person who would take a bullet for Sherlock - and she did.

And that is not Sherlock's fault. I get it; it's the grief speaking. But we've just had an entire episode of Sherlock fighting to keep Mary safe, of warning the Watsons when things were occurring, of following her halfway around the world to bring her home, of assuring her he will do everything he can. And Mary hadn't made it easy, either - she had drugged Sherlock and ran for the hills when he was offering aid.

So sorry John, but you don't get to take your eye off the ball, watch and follow your best friend doing so much and then turn around and blame him when things go to shit. You don't get to do that.

I'm guessing they'll be back solving crimes together soon but seriously. Can we have the nicer John back, please?
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